...Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Ruth 1:16 This is the journey of our lives...

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Fifteen years has flown right by...

May 24th

There are only four questions of value in life. What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made of? What is worth living for? What is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same. Only love.
Don Juan Demarco

Happy 15th Anniversary to my amazing husband! I love you so much

And many more memories to come!

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

I would never do that with my kids!

This is the degradation of my "I would never do that with my kids" list. Yes, I had a list. I big, long, detailed list of what I would never do when I had kids. That was before. Before I had one child, five times in a row. My "I Will Nevers" has dwindled and dwindled and now I am crossing a line. But that was before they started bargaining, whining, cajoling, plotting against me. They are smarter at younger ages, than I ever dreamed. I was smarter then too. Like the kind of smart when your 16 and your not sure when your parents turned into clueless idiots. Somehow, my parents regained their wisdom and I'm becoming the idiot.

I always said that my kids would hear me say "No" and never question me, or whine about it, they would just obey....I know I'm laughing too.

So in the midst of being strong and a good follower througher, I have come to realize that I cannot control these little ones, they are going to have to learn to make good choices or bad. I can only control the consequence. So in trying to be smart I have been allowing them make some of their own decisions and then allowing life and our household rules teach them. Sometimes it works like a charm. Like when Cozette wants to throw a tantrum and I say to her, "fun to be with or go to your room". And she decides that the tantrum is not worth hanging out in her room all alone. Or when Noah wants to play Mincraft everyday and I'm fine with that, but my price is getting his morning shores done by 9am. I don't have to get mad, I just let him know its after 9 and the computer is off limits. Amazing how chores get done! And then their are other times when I'm tired and and I'm sick of thinking up stuff to say to them. When I'm sick of hearing my own voice say the same things over and over and over! That is when, oh this is hard for me to say out loud.
Good old fashioned, run of the mill, you take your nap and I'll give you candy, bribery.
I thought I'd never do it. Ha! Checking that one off the list.
Cozette, loves bribery. I can get her to do almost anything for a stick of gum. Take her medicine, take a nap, go potty..

Silly girl, if we can get past the drama, we do pretty good!
And this clown, he's not so easy. Whatever you say you better be able to back it up. He's more into money. But that works both ways. He's paid me a pretty penny to clean his room. I have my dignity. He learned pretty quickly that $20 bucks doesn't come so easy and its a way better choice to clean your own room for free!
And so far, she's perfect for at least another month. My list works really well on her.
As far as I can tell, bribery works for parenting. I won't be putting bribery back on my "never List" again. I'm just limiting its uses.,keeping its staying power:)