I sometimes feel the opposite is true, and that my home manages me. I have been weighted down by more than enough laundry and housework including the outdoor chores that I get to wondering where my day has gone. Wouldn't I love to think I could get up early and get it all done and still be cheery and delightful when Daniel gets home, oh yeah and a healthy dinner too. I'd still like to to think I could wax my eyebrows, paint my toenails, read a book, even take a shower on a regular basis! I'd like to imagine that when someone just dropped by, even if its the exterminator, I'm not embarrassed at the window sill filth, the dust bunnies under the bed, ect ect... Although this bothers me I find myself so out of time most days that I forget until the next day, or it bubbles over and the kids and Daniel get my pent up frustrations through dinner time and bedtime. I would still like to accomplish what seems to be the impossible. Does anyone do this successfully? Should I want to do this successfully or am I asking too much of myself. I've been seeking and praying, asking if the Proverbs 31 women truly exist and how does she exists. Like a metaphor? In my search I have realized that in my own heart there is a desire to accomplish these things and still have joy and peace in my home all throughout the day. So, in light of the fact that I feel like this desire was placed in my heart by the Holy Spirit, I needed to find a way. I spend a lot of time talking to other home school moms that have more children than me and seem to successfully teach them all and still make it to PE class or field trips mostly un-frazzled. I'm not going to pretend that becoming frustrated or discouraged isn't a daily occurrence for any mom. However, I wanted a better way to do this for me. After talking to quite a few of them, it seemed a written schedule and written chore charts were what most of them claimed worked. I thought through some practical ideas and then was given a book called
Managers of Their Homes a practical guide to daily scheduling for Christian home school Families by Steven and Terri Maxwell. Upon reading this book I was very turned off in some ways by their biblical approach to scheduling, as though every woman who home schools is called to schedule and that it is a biblical mandate. I DO NOT feel that this is true for everyone. I think there is a danger in these types of rules that can leave mothers and wives empty and desperate trying to attain something that is not their calling. Each of us as mother's must determine what the Lord has called us to do in our homes and ask the Lord for that direction. So, in this book I found that some of the scriptures were used out of context and not encouraging whatsoever. I also realize that the hearts of these authors is sweet and they are trying to share something that works for them in their home. The thing I did find refreshing in this book, was a step by step guide to scheduling my family that spoke to me. Most of the time, I look at scheduling as bonding and restrictive taking away my fun-loving spontaneous personality:) unfortunately my spontaneous personality was making it harder for me to function in a house of four children and lots of chores! So I thought I'd give this schedule a try. For an example, I have scheduled myself and mu kids day into 1/2 hour and 1 hour chunks of time. I've also committed to getting up 1 hour before the kids to give me some "me time". I've been getting school done by 12:00 and all my laundry is caught up, the house stays fairly orderly, due to the new chore list for the kids. Which includes vacuuming, changing sheets and wiping down sinks and toilets as some of their new weekly responsibilities. They are actually enjoyign their new schedule because one thing I'm so excited about is the opportunities to spend individual time with each child. Today, as Noah was teaching Braxtyn for 1/2 hour, Cozy was still sleeping her morning nap and Graham and I sat down for our reading time, he looked at me and said, "mom this is my favorite part of our new days". My prayer had been answered, these are precious moments I get to share with each child. Because my schedule is "mine", I can be as lenient as I want, but I'm finding that when we do these things the same each day the kids are looking forward to their special times together and with me. Yesterday, Noah spent such sweet time with Braxtyn teaching her her ABC's and numbers. I have scheduled 1/2 hour of quiet time for the boys while the girls nap in the afternoons, they balked at first and now they create little beds in different rooms of the house to lay down and play their hand held games, giving me 1/2 hour of rest or reading time. Of course some days we will scrap the afternoon schedule and run errands or do something totally spontaneous to mix it up, but morning school time is very big priority and will likely stay the way it is. It seems the more little jobs each person has, even if its play time with a sibling or being my helper at dinner, the less fighting we've had. So all in all it might sound oppressive, but after trying it I cannot believe how much free time I have!
This is what I've received from using this schedule for only two weeks; bible and prayer time of my own, precious "me" time, a clean house, laundry caught up, special alone time with each one of my kids, a pre-school time with Graham and Braxtyn, each sibling has special alone time with each other, my kids are fighting less and less TV time for the kids. For me, these are things that have been plaguing my days. I have a lot of flexibility after lunchtime in my schedule which is nice to run errands and do fun things and Fridays are open to PE and going to the library. So for us, it allows enough free time for fun and enough structure to keep me teaching school. So anyways I had to share my success and remind myself on days that are hard, why I'm doing this!
