Trying..

Don't you get tired of trying?

Trying to clean the house, catching up on the laundry, planning dinners, teaching school, finding shoes, keeping the toilet clean, matching up socks, determining who hit who first, feeding the masses, cleaning out the car....ARGHHHH!

Yesterday, I was tired of trying.

I cried about it.

I ate chocolate.

I drank 2 Dr. Peppers.

I stayed up late, in a dark, QUIET, living room and watched lots of TV.

And then, I slept at least 6 hours straight. ...

And then I tried to get the baby back to sleep, the two year old out of my bed, finished my 7th load of laundry this week and tried to take a shower by myself..

Today, I'm good. I'm no better at trying. In fact, its shot to you know where.BUT, I had an epiphany for the 100th time!

This is life. It's imperfect, unkept, emotional and blessed.

So today, I'm laughing at the me, from yesterday.

I still cried. But only because I watched a highly emotional You-tube video

I still ate chocolate. But only because I rewarded the kids with candy bars for getting A's on their spelling tests..and well for every word they missed, I got a bite :)..

I drank 1 Dr. pepper today.
And I plan on sitting in my dark quiet living room to watch a few recorded shows.

I will just do it with a smile on my face, rather than my jaw set in total aggravation that I'm a total mess.

Speaking of total mess - Quinn thought it funny to climb in the fireplace and eat the ashes.

Just tell yourself this, over and over

I need a start over, caffiene and some sleep..not in that order

Not sure when today actually started, I think 1:45am. Then 3am, then 4:45..I caved and fed her.
All the crying woke the two year old.
The two year old woke the cryer.
The cryer woke the mommy and the daddy.
The battle of wills began.
2am the pac n play went up in the school room. The door firmly closed.
We could still hear the crying..no, she was yelling at me.
That's why I caved and why I yelled at the 2 year old at 4 am.
I feel bad, but I'm so tired, and they are sleeping, so I'm really just feeling bad for myself.

Laundry piling up - check

House a mess - check

School partly done, because I'm too tired to find them and make them come back to finish - check

Made lunch - check

(My list was inspired by Doni)

So today, continues and I'm running on empty. I hope tomorrow is better.

A new baby and all that go's with it..

Baby oh baby..I used to think I knew so much before I had kids..now I know nothing. Five children later, I'm an idiot.

But really, all five are so very different that the same tricks rarely work on the others. I've always wondered how the same kids, from the same parents come away with totally different stories of their childhood. Now I know.
So today, like other mother's I know..I'm at a loss. What to do on what little sleep I'm getting. My sleep debt is getting bigger, you'd think I was a democrat. My house is fighting back and I swear someone put a doubling potion on the laundry and a rat is eating the feet off my boy's socks. And there is someone else living in my house that is is very untidy and cannot under any uncertain terms...hit the bottom of the toilet, pick-up toys, find the laundry baskets, rinse out the sink after brushing, or flush the toilet. I've been grilling the other five who admit to living here, however, WILL NOT admit to the above offenses.


The littlest resident, has decided that after one glorious week of sleeping 10 hour shifts, will now only sleep through the night if visits from mommy, are included in her stay. We are working out other accommodations that include a pac-n-play in the office on the other side of the house. We shall see who holds out longer in the end. Hoping for a peaceful resolution.
The eldest, is now addicted to minecraft and has taken the one and only cell phone with him to the above said office. So, if you haven't heard from me in a while, just know I am safe, and now without the use of both the Internet and phone services.The middle two, who are normally at war about something, have joined forces to try and penetrate my clean-up defenses with outrageous playtime, including full scale rodeo reenactments, a three ring circus and some type of Justin/Selena/Taylor Swift concert series. My fourth -born, a little piece of sunshine, has been skipping happily into my room at 6:30am. I can hardly resist the urge to squeeze her in greeting each morning.
And with my past professional parenting opinions, scattered somewhere among the disaster I call the garage.. I will say, I have escaped some if this craziness with a good book and a cup of coffee, an occasional hike up the mountain, and very good sense of humor and the best part...
My amazing partner in crime

And on days like this, He hands me the keys to his truck (he has all the good music) and I head out on a five minute drive to the Safeway to gather my wits, a few needed essentials, and a coffee..

I know, pathetic. Maybe one day I'll drive to Target.

How does a homeschooler change a light bulb?

Graham's school play..isn't he tall?

Opening some gifts

Some baking with Grandma and cousins

The little girls, talking over some lunch!
Each day, I have this thought..What to post? I actually think of things to write, sit down, and then usually get back up to do a list of things I forgot to do, before sitting down. SO today, I am posting a few pictures from the holidays..I have more to come. The kids did a Christmas play at their "Wednesday school", The other two did a song with the lights out and only flashlights..not a good picture. But Graham, did a musical with a cane. He did great and looked about a year older than everyone else. He is so tall! We did a lot of baking at my mom and dad's house this year. We had so much fun making Christmas cookies with our cousins. And then of course, Quinn is sitting in Cozy's high chair and this seems to suit them just fine. Cozy thinks she's older and Quinn likes the company. And below..the main reason why, I home school. I love to get the most out of a project and this is a perfect example!
This cracks me up! I wish I was this thorough, however, it does show how anything can be a learning adventure!
"Q: How does a homeschooler change a light bulb?
A: First, mom checks out three books at the library on electricity, then the kids make models of light bulbs, read a biography of Thomas Edison and do a skit based on his life. Next, everyone studies the history of lighting methods, wrapping up with dipping their own candles. Then, everyone takes a trip to the store where they compare types of light bulbs as well as prices and figure out how much change they'll get if they buy two bulbs for $1.99 and pay with a five-dollar bill. On the way home, a discussion develops over the history of money and the Federal Reserve System, and also Abraham Lincoln as his picture is on the five-dollar bill. Finally, after building a homemade ladder out of branches dragged from the woods, the light bulb is installed. And there is light."