I hate bathing suit shopping. No one I know, except little teenage girls, like shopping for bathing suits. It's like a battle between showing too much and looking like well, a balloon or worse...anyways, even when I think I've found one, I usually don't love it. And then you have to decide to actually wear it in public. And then at some point, the call of swimming, boating, sun-bathing just overwhelms my need to cover up, and I dive in. Still, I look for the nearest towel as I exit the water. And I feel much more comfortable in my old cover-up the one I've had for the past three summers.
Well, this is also how I feel about moving. Some days I am so ready to put on this uncomfortable new suit and run to the beach for a day of swimming and exploring, but somewhere while I'm sitting on the boat listening to its engine, I am imagining myself on Lake Pleasant and looking forward to going home. I just can't get comfortable in this new place, I feel very alone and very overwhelmed with life here. The strangest part, is that we have had so many amazing adventures and beautiful scenery, you'd think, I was just falling right into it all. And sometimes I get a glimpse of a feeling of comfort, but it is not home. I know the Lord is working some things out in me and offering me little tid bits of something great that He would like to show me. I'm just squirming in this lycra/polyester blend fitted material and would like to run and throw my cover -up on..now, please! I suppose I could keep the cover-up on the whole time, I just think I would miss out on all the fun. And if you know me at all, I'm not a sit on the side lines kinda girl. So here goes...I suppose we will make a splash:)
6 comments:
Brooke, your emotions are coming thru your words so loudly. I am so sorry that you are going thru this period right now. I believe it is especially hard for you guys because of the closeness of your families in AZ. While you are experiencing each NEW ADVENTURE there is always a part of you that seems to be missing. Evenutally, this will get easier and God's plan will be a little bit easier to understand. Praying for you daily, try to enjoy the small things....they add up to tremendous joys for your family!!
Learning to be on your own with only your immediate family is VERY difficult. Its as if a piece is missing or you are being punished somehow. The only piece of wisdom I can offer is that this will make your and Daniel's bond that much stronger.
Please feel free to reach out to me any time....I know how you feel.
Love being sent your way.
Heather
Thank you Heather, it means so much to me. Thank you for responding to my post. Love you back!
You are so good with analogies. Speaking of bathing suit shopping, I had great fun the last time I went. :) You found a great suit and you don't need any cover up girlfriend! :) Anyway, I pray for you each day--you can call me anytime and lay it all out. I'm always here for you even from the other side of the country. :) Love you!!
I love you, I love you, I love you! Praying for you, Daniel and the kids daily that your hearts and minds find peace and comfort in your new home! (But only enough to enjoy your time there....until you come home! :-) )
You can call me anytime too!
Oh Brooke, I'm so sorry that you are having a hard time. But is sounds like you have good perspective. What a great analogy with the bathing suit.
I will continue to keep you guys in my prayers.
Love you Friend!
Just wanted to let you know I'm praying for your family as you try to settle into a new life. I can't even imagine how hard it's been. I especially pray for you to find some homeschool support out there:)
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